Elliott is 9 months old today. I’ve carried him outside for the same amount of time I grew and carried him inside.
If I think back 18 months to when we found out I was pregnant it seems so strange that I wasn’t instantly happy and ready for this new little human. A woman’s hormones during pregnancy, birth and the first few crazy newborn months are nothing short of miraculous though ensuring it wasn’t long before I was not only ready but over the moon excited.
I’d got to the point in my life where I kind of felt a little “free” of the role of mom, it didn’t totally consume me at least. I had every week day to myself and the kids would jump with joy if there was a mention of a babysitter whenever we fancied a date night.
My pregnancy hormones changed my mindset very quickly and the stirrings and kicks of that tiny baby growing created the first links of that mum & baby bond.
By the time Elliott was born I was so ready to experience the newborn phase again but bringing my big 3 along for the ride too.
Having Elliott meant changing our lifestyle again and that’s always a worry. We were happy where we were – exploring, travelling, dining out, date nights etc. I’d personally just decided on taking my fitness from a hobby to a paid job which would now be impacted by a pregnancy and a baby.
During my pregnancy I obviously continued to teach and workout. I stuck to the rule of limited exercise for the first 6 weeks post birth then went back to the gym. I became frustrated with the fact that Elliott would need feeding or he’d not stop crying in the creche and I couldn’t be at the class I wanted to do. I won’t lie there were tears shed from me but then I started to realise it wasn’t a priority anymore. I mean really how silly crying because I couldn’t get to a group ex class.
Fitness needs to be there for me to help with my sanity, to be a role model to my kids and to keep my body moving and active but it doesn’t need to be about vanity which it had become before baby.
Talking of feeding I made the decision to breastfeed Elliott the same as I did my big 3. My aim was to go all the way to 1 years old even though the longest I’d got before was 5 months. 9 months in and we are both still happily nursing. I never deny him the opportunity, I haven’t set him in a strict routine or set amounts of feeds. I let him take comfort from me as well as nutrition and much needed immunity. There are times I would rather be asleep, out with Rob or friends but in general my feeding journey with Elliott has taught me to be unselfish again. This is our last baby – a year of feeding and bonding is minute in the grand scheme of things.
In 9 months the big kids have all formed an amazing relationship with Elliott. Entertainers, nurturers, babysitters and bad influences they are his biggest fans. It’s so heartwarming to hear them laugh together and the joy in babies face when he sees them. They watch him grow and are in awe of each new thing he’s does. He is their baby as much as he is mine and Rob’s we look after him as a team.
I think what I’m trying to say today is that this baby came and changed us for the better. I believe all my children are here for their own individual reason and we are blessed to have them.
Poppy, Izzy, Leo and Elliott – Mummy loves you ❤️